Dahlings, just dropped by as a kind of insurance policy....I can't say too much* but I am sure one of the Dahpne4Boyz mothers works for the FBI or the CIA (she is American and very clever and used to work for NASA, this is true)....so if I suddenly disappear, please contact Mr B - code word RENDITION PROTOCCOL 5 - FAILURE TO PAY SCHOOL SWIMCLUB SUBSCRIPTION - he will understand what you mean and swing into action
You see, the mother in question has been regularly updating us on our son's movements during the epic Cornwall school trip - by cleverly locating and linking us into public webcams where ever they are. Her surveillance skills are outstanding.....
NOTE TO BOY 1 - NEVER EVER SWIPE SURVEILLANCE MOM'S BOY'S BLAZER UNLESS YOU WANT TO WEAR ORANGE . Which to be honest is a very tricky colour for you to pull off with your skintone. And well done on watching all those Jason Bourne films in pre-trip training.
One other thing is worrying me. Apparently the boys have been romping around in Lusty Glaze and Hydra Waterworld. I really, really hope these are local attractions of the beach/swimming pool variety...as I can't help thinking, they would make great names for porn stars. I may have shared this thought already with a few of the mothers. Funny how we can never get playdates these days.
Right, I'm off and if a man in black with an earpiece and a minivan comes looking for me, I was never here, ok?
*That would be a first. Ha ha, Mr B, ha ha.