The other morning Mr B left me another of his adorable little love poems; once again I was Lady Antonia and he was Harold*.
"Have no shirts left
All in wash
Boy 1's Hawaian shirt
My sole option"
Mr B feels this blogging business has gone to my head and I have been neglecting my duties as wife and mother. I feel this is a little unfair, I have been exemplary during boys' week long half-term holiday: for example, I successfully disarmed Boy 2 of bread knife which he was brandishing at Boy 1 when he was a teeny bit upset; I prevented Boy 1 and his partner in crime - er, sorry, his playdate - from throwing Boy 2 over the balcony by putting him on picnic mat and then each grabbing a corner...(Boy 2 quite happy to go along with this scheme for reasons unclear to me); I have properly supervised their TV viewing (though there was a close call when Boy 2 informed Boy 1 he had got a DVD from the local library entitled “Hot and Hard”; a few moments of maternal panic happily relieved by discovery that in fact DVD was “Mario Bros, too hot to handle”).
But when I carried out an on-site inspection, this is what I found waiting for me by the washing machine. AAAAAAAAAAGH, dreadful.
I realised I needed to action this straightaway, this Could Not Go On! I set to work, feverishly.
There, much better! Job done. I find completing household tasks so satisfying!
*have not been the same since reading Lady Antonia Fraser's book about her life with Harold Pinter, "Must you go?" He was always writing her poems, and her life was full of glamour, literati, parties, and stimulating political discussions, but I felt a bit disappointed she did not cover the weekly supermarket shop or how she kept Harold sorted for clean shirts.
oh blighty you and the mr are so funny. and your boys are perfect!
ReplyDelete~janet
ps ~ i have not been drinking. yet.
Dear Janet, glad to hear you have not turned to drink! I do find putting stuff into nice wicker baskets most pleasing. How is weather there? We have had a mini heatwave - by English standards, no doubt you and FF would be wearing cashmere twinsets and boots in such a temperature. Bx
ReplyDeleteGosh those wicker baskets make me miss Anthea Turner and her perfect housewife programmes. I've gone to pot since those days xx
ReplyDeleteOh those wicker baskets are the perfect solution... the washing looks ever so stylish, carefully draped over the sides. So much better than 'the sink'. My boys dump their filthy wet soccer socks in the laundry sink. I forget to look there... often. It's the smell.. after about 3 days that draws me near.. then far. Mr Blighty... you are ever so dashing and eloquent..you would give Mr Darcy a run for his money with your 'love notes'. A-M xx
ReplyDeleteNice washing basket. Perfectly styled for that devil-may-care washing attitude so necessary when you have other people in the house. Was thrilled to read A-M this morning to find you had started blogging. Most excellent. I have removed the rock I'd been hiding under.
ReplyDeleteAnthea Turner still appears on Australian tv!!!! Her love of baskets knows no bounds. Altho why I do not know. I must buy Antonia's book. Pronto. Loving the blog Blighty x
ReplyDeleteDear Blighty, You crack me up. Fantastic work.
ReplyDeleteThe perennial problem of clean business shirts.
ReplyDeleteThe local laundromat that does pick up and home delivery of shirts is starting to look very appealing....
SSG xxx
Hello Blighty. Nice to see you're on the path of righteous blogging. Am off to library website to action this Fraser/Pinter thing.
ReplyDeletePaddy
Don't go changin'. You are quite the amusing haus frau!
ReplyDeleteMy dears, thanks for all the comments. Mr B, who feels he gets a bad press in this blog, is greatly encouraged by comparison to Mr Darcy, he has gone off to work with a spring in his step this morning, hope he does not take it too far e.g. riding breeches and cravat, as they will be the devil to iron..
ReplyDeletedid not know Anthea T had reinvented herself as interior guru, last I heard she was in Hello magazine at her wedding and both she and hubbie were holding choc ice cream bars or something like that as they had got a sponsorship deal, don't think her career ever quite recovered from that.. there is also Linda Barker, also v scary in her enthusiasm for baskets, big cushions and strange metalwork thingies.
I think Mr Blighty and my hubby must be in cahoots. He does frown a bit with all the blogging business. He did however get a very big chuckle from the DVD near miss. Great blog. Thanks to Am for sending me over.
ReplyDeleteDear Moerks, thanks for coming over, do you think your hubby knows that DVD??Bx
ReplyDeleteOh Blighty
ReplyDeleteI'm glad to hear Mr B/D has dashed off[probably in his carriage]to attend to business.
Now we can have a private conversation about the bad press thingy and your concerns.
I too would have trouble with the cravat and riding breeches but cannot understand your dilema.
Don't you realise that as Mrs B/D you are mistress of everything and therefor are not required to be worried with such trivial things.
More importantly you need to concentrate on the very serious things Mr B/D thinks about
ie. Comma placement and Brackets
You and I as lawyers obviously understand his fixationon with these matters but,for your other readers perhaps he needs to lighten up a little and do a guest blog spot on his thoughts about SITC2 or something similar.
If his comments are acceptable[don't publish them if they are not] his profile will no doubt improve.
Ask him if he liked my brackets?[Not too confidant about the comma placement thou]
LOL
MOB