Not suitable for people with irony deficiency and
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Friday, 2 July 2010

Cushioning the Blow

As most of you know, I am a stalker, I mean, admirer of the lovely Faux Fuchsia and her superior blog. I try to emulate her as far as possible. This is often difficult due to the inherent incompatibility between FF 's brand of stylish glamour and my role as mother to Genghis K and Attila. Recently FF did a post about not being under-cushioned, with delicious photos of her cushions, deftly arranged. This I felt I could do. Buying cushions is my idea of home decoration. So much more instantaneously gratifying than any other sort of interior improvements (apart from possibly selling the children on Ebay). Above is the kind of thing I had in mind. Tasteful. Calming. Pleasing to the eye.

Below is what Boys 1 and 2 have in mind re cushions. AAAAAAAGH! NOT calming, NOT pleasing to the eye!!!
Above, Boy 2 at top of cushion mountain, preparing to jump. Go Boy 2, go, don't worry that almost exactly a year ago you broke your arm, don't let that hold you back!
Above, Boy 1, the criminal mastermind behind this devilish scheme.
Boy 1 ready for take off. It is reassuring to note that if he over-cooks his leap, he will just wipe out the TV, DVD player and Mr B's fancy schmancy music playing equipment.
Cushions. Seemingly harmless. But in the wrong hands, deadly.


  1. Well I do believe Blighty your boys have made a geniune effort in rearranging your cushions to look just like the top photo arrangement.
    What talented boys!

  2. Lucky boys be allowed to jump off and on the cushions, I was not even allowed to go into the sitting room un supervised, being told 'not for children' mind you I did manage to break an awful lot of things, I think the highlight was blocking up the entire drainage system with plaster of Paris, my Sister bought me a Shaker-Maker, I got bored with it, cos you had to wait for it to set, so I poured it down the sink, voila! Luckily my sister got the blame for buying such a havoc making gift.

  3. Love it. I'm so glad you don't knowingly under cushion either. I love your colours too.
    Don't we all stalk FF's blog and try to emulate her?

  4. hi blighty,

    gotta love boys.

    this reminds me of the time husband and i went out to dinner (rare) and left the boys home alone (even rarer.) they took turns jumping from the stairs onto the sofa, this required a 4-5 ft soar through the air. 2 weeks later i sat on said sofa with a cup of tea and sofa fell off it's feet. looked underneath and saw wooden blocks crudely nailed in place of feet. hmmmm. my first thought was - boy are these kids clever!


  5. My sister and I used to make tent cities...we used Mother's linens, sheets, and card tables from her bridge group! It was sheer fun.

    Your boys have added a new twist to this kind of play... they must love to jump and climb...they sound like healthy happy boys!

    Good to see that you have an ample supply of pillows.

  6. I feel your last sentence: "Cushions. Seemingly harmless. But in the wrong hands, deadly" should be on a public service announcement to warn all the people who are not savvy enough to read your blog. Thanks for keep our safety your #1 concern!

    PS. My word confirmation was: NOLEX...I hope that's not a sign regarding your quest for a Rolex!!

  7. In some police watchhouses, they have what is known as a 'blue room' which is a cell which has all four walls padded blue. It's for prisoners who are a little boisterous and rowdy and could break their arms when they jump around.

    That would solve your problem, I suspect. (Though I'm not a suspect ... in any crime or anything. People tell me these things).

  8. Oh yes a belly laugh from my hubby too this morning....we're in tears!..."in the wrong hands deadly".... oh we can so relate!... NEVER A DULL moment with boys! I love yours. Go boys, go high! Looks safe to me. A-M xx

  9. Thing One and Thing Two. One of my favorite books for all time:).

  10. So proud!

    Maybe your boys will be the next Nicky Haslam or David Hicks? The TALENT to arrange is really there. Well done.

  11. You won't be surprised to learn that Boy 1 and Girl 1 do the exact same thing, only they jump from the stairs. And when they tire of that, they slide down the stairs while sitting inside duvet covers.

  12. Dear All, I do so love getting all your comments, thank you!
    Anne-Marie - I think my boys may possibly be talented, we just can't work out what at.
    Dash - way to go with the plaster of Paris drain blockage, awesome!
    Deb - just love cushions!
    Polish Hoarder - hi, so nice to hear from you, still loving your blog and your super nails!
    Janet - I am impressed by your boys' repair skills, excellent, when do they get out of prison this time?
    Hostess - I have a great picture in my mind now of your mother's bridge group arriving and finding tent city instead of card tables!
    L - at last someone has realised the important role I play in highlighting Elf and Safety Ishoos.
    Mid-century - how interesting, I need a blue room!
    LPC - yes, I was so tempted to refer to them as Things 1 and 2, they create the same havoc!
    A-M - to be honest, I don't mind this sort of goings on as they were both happy and working nicely together to wreck the living room; I can't bear the whining or fighting which has been known to occur!!
    FF - I mentioned this possibility to Mr B who humphed; how could he possibly think interior design is not macho?
    Hi Septic, hope all well with you, just off to hide all duvet covers!

  13. Just as well your boys 'never knowingly undercushion'...


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