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Monday, 29 August 2011

Important Parenting Advice from Mrs B

Dahlings, I need to share with you all a Parenting Top Tip.*

Here it is:
When you take small(ish, now getting bigger and even more bumptious) boys on hols, you MUST do your research thoroughly beforehand.

You MUST vet all names of local sights.

You may think a visit to Speedwell Cavern in the Peak District is a safe bet.  What you have overlooked is the existence of a combo ticket covering another cavern...with an unfortunate name.

Mmmmm, queueing for about 35 minutes with Boys 1 and 2 jubilantly shouting "ARSE!" every couple of seconds.

Pure class.

It's a good job they had hard hats on; it wasn't low overhanging rocks they needed protecting from, after their exuberant display of parenting failure..

Eventually the ArseFest stopped and we went down the cavern, a former lead mine.

I cheered up at tales of the child miners (a 4 year old worked the bellows providing the miners with air and other children dug for lead with candles clamped in their mouths; candles made with tallow that rotted their teeth and eventually their stomachs.  The average life expectancy of a miner was 27).

But it wasn't all doom and gloom.

There was something in the tour for everyone, even Mrs B.

* This Parenting Top Tip will rank alongside my other PTT which you can find here


  1. Hilarious name for a mine. At first I thought you were having a lend. I can imagine the boyz school teachers' asking them to stand at the front of class and describe a highlight of their holiday :)

    Trust you Blights to have the best seat in the cavern.

  2. Hiya Blights, Wordpress is being mean to me. Can't comment. This is a test.
    Testing, testing, testing, testing, testing, testing,

  3. Is that Mrs. B's arse I see? I think the biggest parenting failure is actually exposing them to lead, but what do I know?

  4. Dear Maggie, the bottom belongs to the young man who was our guide; you go on a boat as the tunnels are flooded. Normally the boat has a motor but it broke towards the end of our tour so as a special bonus we got to see him doing the old style "wall walking" to propel the boat along the cavern - they always did this on the tours before they got engines in the boats. The lives of the miners were just so grim..

  5. Hey Louise - Blogger is being mean to me too - won't let me comment on my own blog and just ate up a huge comment grrrrrr!

  6. I am chuckling at the lengths to which you will go to entertain those lucky boys of yours. Me, I couldn't be arsed with all that ;)

  7. It looks like you have fallen over after drinking a magnum of champagne, but I don't have my glasses on. Maybe that's the Devil's Arse I see?

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