A bit chilly

Dahlings, how are you?   Really, a kitchen extension with an orangery and water feature? Me?  Oh no, I am very happy with my beige linoleum thank you (right eye twitches).

Here we had a bit of snow yesterday but just a light sprinkling, I have to be honest I wasn't completely happy with the coverage.

I suppose I am a bit like Faux Fuchsia and her Christmas tree coverage - she likes it plentiful and well distributed.  Well so do I, with snow.

By the way, here is a pic of the Blighty 2012 Christmas tree.  It did not have uniform coverage, as Boy 1 of his own accord took it upon himself to decorate it.  So there is heavy ornament application around the front and lower branches.  But I don't mind.  I think he shows great promise - one day perhaps he could be a window dresser for Selfridges.

Selfridges window last year - a tribute to Japanese artist Yayoi Kusama

Right, back to the cold weather.

Luckily I bought some boofy snow boots in the sales.

I also popped on my Alpine style waistcoat number, from H&M.  I bet they all wear them at Klosters.

I also rolled out my new fluffy waistcoat, Mr B bought it for me for my birthday, I must let him know.  It's very soft and stroke-able, like having a cat except it does not bring mice into the house or scratch the sofa, fingers crossed.

Last night I decided I wanted a Korat cat, till I read they were very sensitive and got upset by loud noises.  Hmm, probably not ideal for Blighty HQ then.



source

It is essential to eat properly when the weather is cold.

Nourishing drinks are also vital.

I have been reading in the newspapers that according to the Government and various charities,  it is very important to keep an eye on the elderly in this cold weather and call in on them to make sure they are alright.

Well, it's been a couple of days now since the cold snap started, and I am still waiting for my visit.

I even rang the council, I believe in being pro-active.

I talked to a very nice lady and explained I was an older lady and would very much like a young person to drop by the house, to make sure I was nice and warm.  I said I wasn't fussy, a young man,  6 ft 4, blonde, blue eyes, lightly muscled, six pack preferable....there would be some light duties around the house...

source - hmmm, typical

Gosh, I am feeling much warmer already...

Blighty Does Coloured Jeans

Hello Dahlings!  How are we all?


Well, you know how I don't like to be left out.  So the other day, when my first and biggest blogcrush, Ms Faux Fuchsia mentioned her new pink jeans and asked what we were styling ours up with, I felt duty bound to Get In On The Act.

I mean, it's all very well talking about coloured jeans when you are tall and blonde and beautiful; but we also need this crucial fashion trend treated from the perspective of a small marsupial with little stumpy legs and a round tummy... deranged middle aged mother..


Here are my newish bluebell blue jeans, in the sale from old Toppers.

I plan on pairing them with this new, also in the sale from old Toppers, top.

I like a top that screams PMT purchase..

I also love a photo that says can't be bothered with camera settings and other techy stuff..

Excitingly, the bluebell jeans also go with my beloved very old Brora cashmere, in the days when you could just about get something from Brora without approaching the IMF first..

 I don't wear this jumper as often as I should, considering how much I love it.  Do you do this?  This saving things for best malarkey, which is CRAZY, really we should wear and wear our nicest clothes - and not settle for the ok but not that special ones ...

I can also style my jeans up/back/off/ under/with * this gingham number - I like a top that says "Howdy, I am your waitress for the evening at Big Hal's All You Can Eat Country Bar - Be - Queue"

Oh look, another pair of reduced Toppers jeans, in dodgy pink stripy material and with the sale sticker still attached...dead classy me..

 This polka dot number can go with my red jeans - I like an outfit that says "I too can present a children's TV programme, have you seen what I can do with a balloon?"

And this lacy knitted nylon number from H&M - in theory horrid, in practice actually very flattering..

Final unique styling tips

For that Edgy Look accessorise your coloured jeans with:

• sulky pre-teen boy with scowl and small brother in arm-lock
• light coating of Nutella chocolate spread on right thigh
• flowery apron and slippers
• ankle bulge formed by yesterday's sock trapped inside trouser leg

Right. I'm off for a lie down and a rich tea biscuit.  Being a fashion icon is just exhausting.

Shoptastic

Unlike Daphne, my hair is naturally this colour..
Wearing my new spotted silk scarf from Phase 8 and leopard print belt from Zara

Dahlings, I really feel I have been neglecting my role as deranged marsupial style icon to the masses.  One cannot just leave it to Daphne Guinness.  But recently I have been sooo occupied with riot control, kettling and star charts that I have scarcely had time for matters sartorial.  Do forgive me.

Things have not been going that well on the clothes front. Remember the terrible skirt I bought on-line (now safely returned to the Big Warehouse in the Sky)? Well I have experienced another Nasty On-line Buy - ("Nob") - yes, I have had to invent a whole new word to cover this recurring nightmare. I present my latest Nob.

Dress X- Small from Gap, shurely shome mistake, which explains why I am doing the Monty Python Mr Gumby stance.
Nobs - will the nightmare never end?

 Last week I went for a little light shopping with two Mummy friends. We hit up the local Happy Valley Shopping Centre.

Of course, union rules provide that no mother of male children can pursue retail activities without buying some sort of sporting equipment for said male child.   So we found ourselves in the Sports Shop discussing the merits of size 4 bats versus size 3, octopus grips, knocking in (isn't this what got us into the union in the first place?) and oiling your bat.

Look at these prices - but these are for adult cricketers who take it Very Seriously

  

I wondered whether I should get one of these hats - who knew Philip Treacy sold off the peg numbers like these? 

 

Things hotted up when we went into House of Fraser.  Look at these shoes!  When did shoes get so high? And so fetishistic?

These and the shoes below are Kurt Geiger

The leopard and red ones are very understated I feel, for Minnie Mouse

Look close - these are bugtastic

The result of a plot between orthopaedic surgeons, insurance companies and personal injury lawyers?

The girlfriends and I had a laugh trying on lots of clothes and coming out of the changing rooms in fits of giggles - it was like being a teenager again...  I did not buy anything except for the spotty silk scarf I am modelling in the first pic in this post.

But you can't keep a shoptart down - this week I popped up to London and had a toddle round Oxford Street, ending up in Selfridges.  I spotted this chap by the Creme de la Mer counter, probably about to spend the fee from his latest movie on a pot of skin serum.

Mr Clive Owen

He looked at me with ill-concealed lust  failed to register my existence and so I had a good peruse of the OPI stand and bought this orange polish from their Summer 2011 Texas range.

  

On the right is the OPI polish, on the left  a polish from Accessorize in Starlet, cheap as chips but my goodness, it stays on like a dream

When I had finished annoying the OPI ladies by putting the polishes back in the wrong place (nail polish, bringing people together) and walked back past the Creme de la Mer counter Mr O was still there - bless, either he was lurking, hoping to talk to me or there was some terrible shortage of premium unguents for Hollywood A listers.. He was very tall, tanned and striking, in a dark suit.  But I just know he wouldn't have Mr Blighty's drafting skills...

I faced the ever hectic MAC counter at Selfridges and bought a lipstick called Vegas Vamp.

I hear that lipstick sales are up, an indicator of economic downturn; hear that Mr B? I am not spendthrift, I am an important economic indicator...

I like MAC - they don't take themselves too seriously.  I picked this lipgloss up a while ago - it's got a pic of Cruella de Ville on it, a true style icon indeed, though not dog friendly..

A few other things winked at me and asked me to take them home:

  

Orange belt from Zara

Dress from H&M - I took Piglet and his knitted vest from Winnie the Pooh as my style inspiration

  

Silk dress from Zara

 In fact it was only Mr Owen who did not to wink and beg to come home with me.

Just as well.

He would have hated my moisturiser.

The Horrifying Return of Repetitive Dress Syndrome

Hello Dahlings,

I trust you are all well and looking forward to the weekend, except for those of you ahead of the rest of us, in which case, (not wanting to introduce a down note or anything), make the most of your weekend, it's halfway through!

First a housekeeping point: the lovely Janet of Gardener's Cottage asked me to do away with word verification.  I pushed some buttons randomly and hope that's done the trick ( if not, NASA: sorry about that satellite).  The wordster went out on a high note: Louise of North of Queensland was joking about Boy 2's refusal to eat much apart from fish and chips.  The wordster as its swansong came up with: "fried".  Excellent.

I've also had fun doing labels for the posts, but with limited success: if anyone spots "macaroni chees" (sic) lurking around, well, I don't know what it's doing there either...and just like my real life version of that dish, it seems determined to stay put...

Now, as the world is in turmoil what with cyclones and political change and economic worries, I thought I should focus on a really important issue: Repetitive Dress Syndrome ("RDS").   You may recall I highlighted this topic a while ago. That time the RDS involved  black and white.  Well, it's back and even more serious.  This time it's  leopard print.  Gasp.

Very old dress in leopard print, Karen Millen:

Much newer dress, in, oh, yes, leopard print from Marks and Spencer:

Top from Zara in pink polka dots more bl**dy leopard print:

Old dress from H and M in - oh god this is so repetitive, I obviously need some sort of counselling or at least sponsorship from the World Wildlife Fund (or World Wrestling Federation?):

Newer dress from H and M in familiar looking print ( a bit racy this one, to be worn with leggings otherwise will look as if Mrs B has hit on new way of getting money to pay school fees):

The RDS has even affected my accessorisation (top fashion word):

Another leopard top, again from Zara.  Right, I've had enough, this is ridiculous:

 (Unconnected anecdote: many years ago, in the law firm where I apparently worked, a partner came up to me, peered at my chest and said "My wife has some of those." To this day I cling to the hope he was talking about the pearls).

But have just thought of silver lining to the whole RDS business: Mr B thinks I am being super frugal, always wearing the same outfit...he may well suggest I go treat myself to some more clothes...

Catch Up (What did the Mummy Tomato say to the Baby Tomato?)

Dahlings, I have been such a terrible blogger recently, I do apologise. After my release from house arrest - I mean - now that school hols have finished - life seems to have resumed with a rush.

Getting back into the school routine was quite frankly a struggle. I know how this lady feels.

The boys weren't too keen on going back to school either. But one day someone brought in some puppies for the boys to see. Here's Boy 1 - he is surprisingly gentle with animals and babies - it's only Boy 2 he likes to thump about. There were 3 of these retriever puppies, about 8 weeks old I think, and very sleepy after all the attention from the boys.

Here's a book I got in the January sales. It lampoons mercilessly lots of well known books (the author has a column in a newspaper doing this). Probably best to dip in and out of, rather than read all in one go. Some of it's very crude and over the top as the books spoofed include Lady Chatterley's Lover; Crash; and American Psycho. I did think the author crossed over a line when he takes on The Great Gatsby and Love in a Cold Climate, those books are sacrosanct!!

I went on a little jaunt up to London and called in at the Oxford Street TopShop.

I think I really am getting too old for TopShop. Look at those girls' hair. Weird.

And their eye shadow application definitely errs on the over-enthusiastic side.

Is this a look I should adopt for parent/teacher meetings?

And this poor girl has gone to the other extreme - no hair at all and suspended from the ceiling by a rope. Not good.

I tried a couple of dresses on but my heart wasn't in it. This was crumply and creasy.

This looks like a 1970s air hostess outfit - British Airways I think, the crimplene must be a fire risk.

I also swung by H&M. I liked this skirt, but did not buy it, I could just see it languishing in the wardrobe looking pretty but unworn. When did I get so sensible? Shocking.

I liked the dogs in the H&M window. Maybe I could get Boy 1 one of those?

Must go, Mr B has come home and is now playing with the boys' Scalextric racing car thing. All by himself. The boys are in bed. I guess Mr B is reliving his youth.