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Tuesday, 24 May 2011

Shoptastic

Unlike Daphne, my hair is naturally this colour..
Wearing my new spotted silk scarf from Phase 8 and leopard print belt from Zara
Dahlings, I really feel I have been neglecting my role as deranged marsupial style icon to the masses.  One cannot just leave it to Daphne Guinness.  But recently I have been sooo occupied with riot control, kettling and star charts that I have scarcely had time for matters sartorial.  Do forgive me.

Things have not been going that well on the clothes front. Remember the terrible skirt I bought on-line (now safely returned to the Big Warehouse in the Sky)? Well I have experienced another Nasty On-line Buy - ("Nob") - yes, I have had to invent a whole new word to cover this recurring nightmare. I present my latest Nob.

Dress X- Small from Gap, shurely shome mistake, which explains why I am doing the Monty Python Mr Gumby stance.
Nobs - will the nightmare never end?
 Last week I went for a little light shopping with two Mummy friends. We hit up the local Happy Valley Shopping Centre.

Of course, union rules provide that no mother of male children can pursue retail activities without buying some sort of sporting equipment for said male child.   So we found ourselves in the Sports Shop discussing the merits of size 4 bats versus size 3, octopus grips, knocking in (isn't this what got us into the union in the first place?) and oiling your bat.
Look at these prices - but these are for adult cricketers who take it Very Seriously

  

I wondered whether I should get one of these hats - who knew Philip Treacy sold off the peg numbers like these? 
 

Things hotted up when we went into House of Fraser.  Look at these shoes!  When did shoes get so high? And so fetishistic?

These and the shoes below are Kurt Geiger

The leopard and red ones are very understated I feel, for Minnie Mouse

Look close - these are bugtastic

The result of a plot between orthopaedic surgeons, insurance companies and personal injury lawyers?

The girlfriends and I had a laugh trying on lots of clothes and coming out of the changing rooms in fits of giggles - it was like being a teenager again...  I did not buy anything except for the spotty silk scarf I am modelling in the first pic in this post.


But you can't keep a shoptart down - this week I popped up to London and had a toddle round Oxford Street, ending up in Selfridges.  I spotted this chap by the Creme de la Mer counter, probably about to spend the fee from his latest movie on a pot of skin serum.
Mr Clive Owen

He looked at me with ill-concealed lust  failed to register my existence and so I had a good peruse of the OPI stand and bought this orange polish from their Summer 2011 Texas range.
  
On the right is the OPI polish, on the left  a polish from Accessorize in Starlet, cheap as chips but my goodness, it stays on like a dream


When I had finished annoying the OPI ladies by putting the polishes back in the wrong place (nail polish, bringing people together) and walked back past the Creme de la Mer counter Mr O was still there - bless, either he was lurking, hoping to talk to me or there was some terrible shortage of premium unguents for Hollywood A listers.. He was very tall, tanned and striking, in a dark suit.  But I just know he wouldn't have Mr Blighty's drafting skills...


I faced the ever hectic MAC counter at Selfridges and bought a lipstick called Vegas Vamp.

I hear that lipstick sales are up, an indicator of economic downturn; hear that Mr B? I am not spendthrift, I am an important economic indicator...

I like MAC - they don't take themselves too seriously.  I picked this lipgloss up a while ago - it's got a pic of Cruella de Ville on it, a true style icon indeed, though not dog friendly..


A few other things winked at me and asked me to take them home:
  
Orange belt from Zara

Dress from H&M - I took Piglet and his knitted vest from Winnie the Pooh as my style inspiration
  
Silk dress from Zara

 In fact it was only Mr Owen who did not to wink and beg to come home with me.

Just as well.

He would have hated my moisturiser.

26 comments:

  1. Swooning...
    I would have asked for his autograph written in OPI of course!

    Those are seriously high shoes...I'd topple over.

    I think it is much safer to shop for clothes in person...and you look like you were very successful.

    I spy an orange belt too Blighty...
    FF has been favouring orange too!

    I am on a Vitamin C kick these days...

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  2. dearest blights,

    you never disappoint.

    xo
    janet

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  3. Girl you crack me up. That sure is a mighty large x-small garment!
    My boy owned a philip treacy off the rack too Blights. Are they not the most delightful piece of apparel?
    The shoes. Well my darling daughter has stacks of mega high heels and for the life of me I do not know how these youngins can possibly walk without toppling over.
    Ole London town is obviously the place to be for celeb spotting at the Le Mer counter. I do hope you are happy with your recent purchases and I'm adopting the term Shoptart dahling, because I fear I am one.
    Superb post as always :)
    xx
    xx

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  4. ooh, love the H&M dress, hate those last shoes you pictured. They look like they had lip injections that went terribly, terribly wrong.
    Happy shopping, hopefully it stays NOB free!

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  5. Dear Blights

    I am loving your new Opi polish and lippy sick and that silk dress is Killer too. Well done. Mr B must be overjoyed that you are stimulating the economy is such a robust fashion. Who knew Clive used creme de la mer????

    I have a huge void in my life now that the Royal Wedding is over and Carole's gone back to Buckleberry....not even looking at Party Pieces online shop cheers me. What to do?

    Keep up all your Good Work. Your Country, like the Queen, Quite Clearly Needs You.

    Yours in Shoptastic-ness,

    FF xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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  6. Blighty this is hilarious - laughing out loud at the 'piglet inspired stripes' comment - too, too funny and so much to giggle about in one post! Love it. XX

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  7. Piglet is an excellenct muse - I love that dress!
    The height of those shoes make me feel dizzy and old.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Blighty, I'm totally with you about the nob problem, and I'm about nobbed out to the point of not ob-ing anymore. But I love your instant recovery via in-real-life shopping and the Texas OPI collection, which you know all the gals in my state are wearing, de rigeur. Those stripper heels... *sigh* a tragic trend that can't go away too soon. I laugh when I see young women in business suits lurch around in them like they're about ready to throw themselves on a dance pole as "the naughty secretary" -- sartorial dissonance at its most pathetic.

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  9. You are so right about those shoes being a plot Blighty! They are diabolical. And I agree with Faux Texan too, women who totter about on them at work look quite odd.
    Are we middle aged? Well, yes. The footwear I get most excited about is the sort that is put away instead of being dumped by the front door...
    Clive probably was loitering about looking for a chance to talk to you Blighty-however he rightly realised that a woman of your intelligence and humour would need more than a boy toy such as him!
    Polly xx

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  10. Oh Clive, those eyes! How did you control yourself Blighty? Although i thought he was more rugged than that. I can't imagine him dabbing cream around those eyes with his ring finger. Shame really.

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  11. Hello Blights, I hope this comment makes it through the Wordpress/Blogger Moratorium of testing just how inept Lou is navigating her way through the maze of blog/commenting/blogger/wordpress/alltoohardforme - blah, stuff.

    So, Clive Owen, I am not jealous, NOT!!!!!! why didn't you drag him out when I was with you in London???

    Love Lou

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  12. OH MY GOD, DID IT WORK?
    I'M AMAZED - I ONLY HAD 8 GOES - AND I DID EXACTLY THE SAME THING EACH TIME!!!!!!
    Blogger/Wordpress - 1,765
    Lou - 1.
    Yay

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  13. Dear Mrs Blighty, Goodness Blogger went bung for quite a long time - this post completely vanished into the ether. Are you thinking of bagging a French philosopher, being as you are a rival style icon to the Stout Princess? Actually, I saw a photo of her in some of the highest and strangest of beigr shoes and I really wondered why. Sometimes, one has to imagine how one will feel seeing the photos 15/20/25 years on. Often after trying on outfit after outfit, I simply buy a lippie or some nailpolish too. So much concentrated pleasure in such little boxes for relatively small sums of money! Thank you for the story and picture of Clive. I now feel torn - Clive or Daniel??? Who can choose???? love Lindaxxx (still wondering about the knocking in, up, on, out...)

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  14. Lots of fun, as always. Will be using NOB from now on! Love your purchases (oops, sorry, economic indicators!) - that pretty piglet dress is crying out for a long w/e in Cromer and a huge icecream! xxx

    PS Clive Owen - really? He looks like he'd pinch your touche eclat while your back was turned!

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  15. Love all your new purchases and all those shoes look gorgeous! :)

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  16. um, you saw him and you didn't offer to use your bare skin to apply moisturizer to the body part of his choice? for shame!

    i once tried a generous la mer sample for a week, and it felt like cheap drugstore nivea, you know, the original in the navy pack? i hated it and loved the fact that it wasn't in fact a miracle or i would have been forced to spend the equivalent of a small nation's GDP on that shit.

    hi!

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  17. Hi Blights! Do you remember my yearning for the bean? Well, it is in the box! The white ribbon is folded around the box so beautifully, I don't want to ruin this ready made piece of consumer-art yet. cheers, a very happy Paula

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  18. Your shopping expedition sounded very fun - especially with a bit of celebrity spotting! Your blog is hilarious! Fifi

    ReplyDelete
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